Traditions That Became Meaningful Only After Birth

Before becoming a mother myself, postpartum traditions mostly existed somewhere in the background of family conversations. I was too young when my brother was born to really remember the foods or rituals surrounding my mother’s recovery. And later, when my cousins were born, my nani usually travelled abroad to stay with my mausi during their postpartum period. So even though I grew up hearing occasional references to things women should eat, avoid, drink, or do after childbirth, I never thought about those traditions very deeply.

Until I suddenly became the person recovering after birth myself. And then, many of those same instructions, recipes, and routines quietly returned, this time for me. One thing I realised very quickly was that postpartum care in our family was not treated casually at all. Recovery was considered something delicate. Something that needed warmth, nourishment, rest, and time. And almost every instruction I received somehow connected back to one of those ideas.

Recovery Was Treated Like Warmth

One of the first things both my mother and mother-in-law told me postpartum was to avoid anything cold. I was only supposed to drink warm water. Food had to be freshly prepared and warm too, nothing directly from the fridge. I was constantly reminded to stay warm, wear warm clothes, and avoid getting cold because the body becomes weak after delivery. My mother-in-law had also brought gond ke laddoos because they are considered warming during postpartum recovery. At some point, I realised that almost every postpartum instruction somehow came back to the same idea: warmth.

Foods Meant to Nourish Recovery

Food during postpartum also came with its own quiet logic. Some things were encouraged repeatedly because the women in my family believed they helped with recovery, strength, or breastfeeding.

Both my mother and mother-in-law encouraged me to drink ajwain water regularly because they believed its warmth and digestive properties would indirectly help the baby through breastmilk and reduce gas issues. Masoor dal was another thing everyone insisted I eat frequently because it was believed to help milk supply. My mother-in-law often made whole masoor dal in a simple ghughni-style preparation with light spices, ginger, and garlic. It was warm, comforting, and easy to eat repeatedly during those early weeks. My mother, meanwhile, made masoor dal pakodas, soft lentil fritters that felt filling without being too heavy. Alongside these, I was also constantly encouraged to eat ghee and dry fruits and drink milk for strength and energy during recovery.

At the same time, there were also foods that both my mother and mother-in-law suggested avoiding in the beginning. Things like peas, cauliflower, cabbage, chana, baingan, and urad dal were all associated with either gas, digestion issues, inflammation, or discomfort during recovery.

Whether every single belief had scientific backing or not was never really the point. The larger idea was always the same: recovery should be handled gently, and food was treated as an important part of that care.

The Body Was Expected to Heal Slowly

Postpartum recovery in our family was also closely connected to rest. My mother would massage my body with ajwain and garlic-infused mustard oil, which she believed helped the body recover better after childbirth. I was constantly reminded not to move around too much in the beginning, avoid too much strain, and rest whenever possible. Even sitting criss-cross was discouraged for some time because, according to my mother, the body remains physically vulnerable after delivery. A lot of postpartum care seemed to revolve around the idea that recovery should not be rushed.

Recipes I Want to Remember

Some postpartum foods were simple, everyday meals prepared slightly differently during recovery. But a few recipes felt much bigger than that. These were the recipes my nani made for my mother after childbirth, and later the same recipes my mother made for me. And because many family recipes survive mostly through memory and verbal instructions, I wanted to write these down properly, partly for this blog and partly for myself.

I know postpartum traditions differ across regions, communities, and even families. These are simply the ones that exist in ours.

Methi Laddoo

A postpartum laddoo is traditionally made in our family for warmth, recovery, and nourishment after childbirth.

Ingredients

• Fenugreek (मेथी दाना) — 60g
• Dry Fruits
  • Cashew (काजू) — 100g
  • Raisin (किशमिश) — 100g
  • Almond (बादाम) — 100g
  • Pistachio (पिस्ता) — 100g
  • Desiccated Coconut (सूखा नारियल पाउडर) — 100g
  • Walnut (अखरोट) — 100g
  • Fox nuts (मखाना) — 100g
  • De-seeded Dry Dates (छुहारा) — 100g
• Seeds
  • Pumpkin seeds (कद्दू के बीज) — 50g
  • Sunflower seeds (सूरजमुखी के बीज) — 50g
  • Pine nuts (चिलगोजा) — 50g
• Small Seeds
  • Poppy seeds (पोस्ता दाना) — 40-50g
  • Black Sesame Seeds (काले तिल) — 25g
  • White Sesame Seeds (सफेद तिल) — 25g
• Tragacanth Gum (गोंद कतीरा) — 100g
• Dry ginger powder (सोंठ) — 3-4 tbsp
• Cardamom powder (इलायची पाउडर) — 1-1.5 tbsp
• Freshly crushed Black pepper (काली मिर्च) — 2-3 tbsp
• Wheat flour (गेहूं का आटा) — 160g
• Jaggery (गुड़) — 650g
• Milk (दूध) — 0.5 cup or maybe a little more
• Ghee (घी) — 250g

Preparation

1. Dry roast the fenugreek (methi) seeds and grind them in a mixer. Do not grind them into a very fine powder.
2. Soak the ground methi in milk and let it rest for 1–2 hours so it softens and absorbs the milk.
3. Fry the edible gum (gond) in ghee until it puffs up.
4. Roast all the dry fruits in ghee.
5. Roast the seeds in ghee as well.
6. Grind the roasted dry fruits and seeds coarsely in a mixer.
7. Dry roast the smaller seeds separately.
8. Roast the soaked methi mixture in ghee.
9. Roast the wheat flour thoroughly in ghee until well-cooked and aromatic.
10. Mix everything together.
11. Add dry ginger powder and cardamom powder.
12. Crush black pepper and add that too.
13. Mix everything well.
14. Add the roasted small seeds.
15. Chop the jaggery into small pieces and melt it in 2–3 tablespoons of ghee. If needed, add 2–3 tablespoons of water.
16. Once the jaggery melts completely, pour it into the mixture and combine everything well.
17. Shape the mixture into laddoos while still warm.

How It Was Eaten

One laddoo every morning with milk

Achhwain (अछवाइन)

Another postpartum preparation passed down through the women in my family.

Ingredients

• Nigella Seeds (मंगरैला) — 100g
• Fresh Turmeric (हल्दी) — 100g
• Ginger (अदरक) — 100g
• Cumin (जीरा) — 100g
• Raisins (किशमिश) — 100g
• Dry Dates (छुहारा) — 100g
• Jaggery (गुड़) — 500g
• Ghee (घी) — 500g
• Cashew (काजू) — optional
• Almond (बादाम) — optional

Preparation

1. Wash all the ingredients and soak them in water overnight.
2. The next day, grind everything into a fine paste.
3. Heat ghee in a pan and roast each ground ingredient separately until all the moisture evaporates.
4. Then combine everything together and roast again for a little longer.
5. Add jaggery.
6. Once the mixture comes to a boil with the jaggery, switch off the gas/stove.

How It Was Consumed

One large spoon every morning with milk.

Closing Reflection

Looking back now, I realise that almost every postpartum instruction I received, whether it was about warm water, oil massage, avoiding cold food, resting more, or eating certain things, came from the same underlying belief: that recovery after childbirth should be handled gently. Some parts of my postpartum recovery came from hospitals, healthcare systems, and medical professionals. And some came from women in my family who had inherited these traditions long before me. I do not know which things were scientifically necessary, which were symbolic, and which simply survived through generations because they made women feel cared for. But I do know that during postpartum, being cared for mattered just as much as recovering.